Then all of a sudden, this tear plopped down on the checkerboard. On one of the red squares – boy, I can still see it. She just rubbed it into the board with her finger. I don't know why, but it bothered hell out of me. So what I did was, I went over and made her move over on the glider so that I could sit down next to her – I practically sat down in her lap, as a matter of fact. Then she really started to cry, and the next thing I knew, I was kissing her all over – anywhere – her eyes, her nose, her forehead, her eyebrows and all, her ears – her whole face except her mouth and all. She sort of wouldn't let me get to her mouth.
I went down by a different staircase, and i saw another "fuck you" on the wall. I tried to rub it off with my hand again, but this one was scratched on, with a knife or something. It wouldn't come off. It's hopeless, anyway. If you had a million years to do it in, you couldn't rub out even half the "fuck you" signs in the world.
And yet I still act sometimes like I was only about twelve. Everybody says that, especially my father. It's partly true, too, but it isn't all true. People always think something's all true. I don't give a damn, except that I get bored sometimes when people tell me to act my age. Sometimes I act a lot older than I am – I really do – but people never notice it. People never notice anything.
The bellboy that showed me to the room was this very old guy around sixty-five. He was even more depressing than the room was. He was one of those bald guys that comb all their hair over from the side to cover up the baldness. I'd rather be bald than do that. Anyway, what a gorgeous job for a guy around sixty-five years old. Carrying people's suitcases and waiting for a tip.
واخذت اراقب الفتيات، ........................................كان مشهداً لطيفاً إن كنت تعرف ما أعنيه. وكان المشهد من الناحية الأخرى مثيرا للضيق لأنك سوف تتساءل: ماذا سوف يحدث لهن في المستقبل بحق الجحيم. أعني عندما يتخرجن من المدرسة والكلية. وتقدر أن معظمهن سوف يتزوجن أولادا بلهاء، أولادا من النوع الذي يتحدث عن عدد الأميال التي تقطعها سيارته بجالون البنزين الواحد. أولادا يفقدون أعصابهم كالأطفال عندما تنتصر عليهم في الجولف، أو في لعبة سخيفة مثل تنس الطاولة، أولادا أدنياء جدا، لا يقرؤون كتبا، أولادا مضجرين.
But you're wrong about that hating business. I mean about hating football players and all. You really are. I don't hate too many guys. What I may do, I may hate them for a little while, like this guy Stradlater I knew at Pencey or this other boy, Robert Ackley. I hated them once in a while- I admit it- but it doesn't last too long, is what I mean. After a while, if I didn't see them, if they didn't come in the room, or if I din't see them in the dining room for a couple of meals, I sort of missed them. I mean I sort of missed them.
Boy, it began to rain like a bastard. In buckets, I swear to God. All the parents and mothers and everybody went over and stood right under the roof of the carrousel, so they wouldn't get soaked to the skin or anything, but I stuck around on the bench for quite a while. I got pretty soaking wet, especially my neck and my pants. My hunting hat really gave me quite a lot of protection, in a way; but I got soaked anyway. I didn't care, though. I felt so damn happy all of a sudden, the way old Phoebe kept going around and around. I was damn near bawling, I felt so damn happy, if you want to know the truth. I don't know why. It was just that she looked so damn nice, the way she kept going around and around, in her blue coat and all. God, I wish you could've been there.
The thing is, though, I don't like the idea. It stinks, if you analyze it. I think if you don't really like a girl, you shouldn't horse around with her at all, and if you do like her, then you're supposed to like her face, and if you like her face, you ought to be careful about doing crumby stuff to it, like squirting water all over it.
But it was worth it. The blonde was some dancer. She was one of the best dancers I ever danced with. I'm not kidding, some of these very stupid girls can really knock you out on a dance floor. You take a really smart girl, and half the time she's trying to lead you around the dance floor, or else she's such a lousy dancer, the best thing to do is stay at the table and just get drunk with her.
It's really hard to be roomates with people if your suitcases are much better than theirs--if yours are the really good ones and theirs aren't. You think if they're intelligent and all, the other person, and have a good sense of humor, that they don't give a damn whose suitcases are better, but they do. They really do.
Hava güneşliyse durum o kadar kötü sayılmazdı, ama bir iki kez -tam iki kez- biz mezarlıktayken yağmur başladı. Korkunçtu. Yağmur yağıyordu çocuğun başındaki mezar taşına, karnının üstündeki çimlere. Her yer sırılsıklam olmuştu. Mezarlığı ziyarete gelen herkes deli gibi arabalarına koşmaya başladı. İşte bunu görünce deli oluyordum neredeyse. Bütün ziyaretçiler arabalarına atlayıp, radyolarını açabilirler, yemeğe bir yerlere gidebilirlerdi; Allie dışındaki herkes. Buna dayanamamıştım.
The one that sang, old Janine, was always whispering into the g***** microphone before she sang. She'd say, 'And now we like to geeve you our impression of Vooly Voo Fransay. Eet ees the story of leetle Fransh girl who comes to a beeg ceety, just like New York, and falls een love wees a leetle boy from Brookleen. We hope you like eet.' Then, when she was all done whispering and being cute as hell, she'd sing some dopey song, half in English and half in French, and drive all the phonies in the place mad with joy.
But my parents, especially my mother, she has ears like a goddam bloodhound. So I took it very, very easy when I went past their door. I even held my breath, for God's sake. You can hit my father over the head with a chair and he won't wake up, but my mother, all you have to do to my mother is cough somewhere in Siberia and she'll hear you.
Многие, очень многие люди пережили ту же растерянность в вопросах нравственных, душевных, какую ты переживаешь сейчас. К счастью, некоторые из них записали свои переживани. От них ты многому научишься — если, конечно, захочешь. Так же, как другие когда-нибудь научатся от тебя, если у тебя будет, что им сказать. Взаимная помощь — это прекрасно. И она не только в знаниях. Она в поэзии. Она в истории.
— Знаеш ли какъв ми се ще да стана? Искам да кажа, ако ми дадат да си избера, дявол да го вземе....все си представям малки дечица да си играят на някаква игра в една голяма ръжена нива. Хиляди деца — а наоколо няма никой, никой голям човек, искам да кажа — освен мене. А аз стоя на ръба на някаква шеметна пропаст. И каква ми е работата? Да спасявам всяко дете, което тръгне към пропастта — искам да кажа, ако то се е затичало и не вижда накъде отива, аз да изляза отнякъде и да го спася. Ето, това бих правил по цял ден. Просто ми се иска да бъда спасителят в ръжта. Знам, че е лудост, но ей на, това е единственото нещо, което наистина ми се иска да бъда. Зная, че е лудост.